03:09 pm
Last night was mostly quiet.
I didn't really do much. School was fine. It wasn't until after school when Dad saw that I had gone to the bank to withdraw the money for
the school ring that things got a little messy. He just doesn't get that sometimes I just want to get the same things my friends have.
I have everything all ready for it. I can't wait. In the picture it looks really cool. I like it.
Pete said he's reserved judgment for when he
sees the actual ring.
I stopped by the mansion to do deliveries and to see Lex. Things are still a little tense between him and Mr. K. I hope they work it out. I
really would hate to see their friendship suffer over this. Lex and I talked about his need for privacy and his need to keep us a secret.
I'm fine with that. I can't understand why other people would think it was any of their business.
Lex is going to see Bruce tonight in Gotham. There's some sort of fundraiser he has to attend.
Lex said he wished he could take me but
we both know it would look bad if I went. Besides, that stuff is just not my speed. I would rather hang with
Pete tonight. We're going to play
some basketball then hang out at the Talon.
I made sure to tell Lex not to come home with any strange women. After all the last time he went away he came home with that woman who
almost killed him. I have to admit, I do feel a little bit apprehensive over this. He told me even thought about bringing a 'date' just for
show. I told him I was fine with that. If he did that then other women would leave him alone, right?
We had the Torch meeting this morning. The article is great. Chloe did a wonderful job with it and she kept my name completely out of it. Some
people will know it's me, but I don't care. I think it's time this story gets told. I feel so much better knowing that on Monday it will be
out there and not just a dirty secret any more. Chloe is so awesome. I really love her. She's the most amazing friend ever. She really did a
great job with this whole thing. I am very proud of her and Lana. They both saw something that needed to be addressed and they didn't let
anybody stop them. Not even me.
At least I'll get to see Lex tomorrow night. He promised me we could have a nice night in the mansion. It will be just the two of us.
~
10:51 pm
Another quiet night.
Yesterday Pete and I stayed at the Talon until closing. We pretty much just bugged each other and drank tons of latte. It
was cool just to hang. Pete is a total lady's man. He spent a good ten minutes talking to this girl while I sat off to the side making faces
at him. She had her back to me. It was totally hilarious when he cracked up and she almost walked away. He was not impressed, but we had a
good laugh over it. At least he didn't urge me to try to ask out Lana. I'm so glad he took me seriously.
I went over to the mansion tonight to see Lex. He didn't have much to say about the party. I jokingly looked around the mansion for an extra
guest. I never once thought he'd come home with a new wife. Although with this crazy town you never know. At least he went along with my
joke. We played some chess and talked about his Dad and other things. I can't believe how big that place is and he still feels crowded in by
his father's presence. I haven't really met his Dad yet and I get the feeling
Lex would rather keep it that way. It's probably going to be
really hard to avoid his father forever. I'm sure going to try. He sounds a little overbearing.
I'm off to do some stargazing.
~
12:19 pm
Have you ever noticed how boring adults are?
I mean, they dress so badly and they act dead. Maybe not all of them dress badly.
Lex is technically an adult and he
dresses fine.
I got my class ring. It's totally awesome. My Dad is going to freak when he finds out I bought it.
I just called Lex. We made a date for tonight. I can't wait to see him. He sounded so sexy and cute on the phone. I love his phone voice.
It's enough to make a guy want Lex's naughty tongue all over his body parts. My body parts of course since his tongue is not allowed
to go on anybody else's body.
I'm thinking that I need a poll to help me decide what Lex and I should do on our date tonight.
~
06:27 pm
Big date tonight.
I'm hanging out in the loft to get ready for my date. I told Mom and Dad that I ate in town and that I have way too much homework to do the
deliveries or chores. I did most of the chores this morning anyway so Dad can handle the easy stuff. They both fell for it. They're so
gullible. I think I'll do my homework after my date.
I can't wait to see Lex tonight. I stopped off at the drugstore to pick up an extra pack of condoms. You never know how many you'll need. It
looks like we're in for a good time tonight. I have an idea of what I want to do. I think he's going to be pleasantly surprised.
I think for tonight's date I need to dress for the occasion, only all my dress clothes are of the really boring variety. I hate everything I
own. I need cooler clothes. At least I still have those dark jeans I never wear. I guess I could just wear a t-shirt with the jeans. It's
not like he'll be looking at my clothes once they're off anyway.
I can't wait to go over there and rip his clothes off. I've always wanted to just go over to the mansion, grab him, rip all his clothes off,
and then have my way with him. I'd bend him over the sofa or bed or whatever furniture happens to be near by. More handcuffs in bed would be
so awesome. I'd love to have him trapped under me, powerless to break free from my tight grip. I'd love to feel him fighting under me. After
all, we have the safe word, so if things get out of hand (which they never would because I am so careful) he can always shout cherry pie.
It sucks to be poor. At least I can get me some rich ass.
~
09:45 pm
That was the best date ever.
Lex was the hottest thing ever. He was so there. I wanted to try something new this time around. It was amazing. He was amazing. We were
perfect together. I really wish I didn't have to come home. I wanted to show him over and over again how much I love his fine ass-ets.
We went up to his room right after I arrived. He looked so hot, but all I wanted was to get his clothes off. I wanted to make him mine. I
wanted to wipe every single memory of all others before me out of his head. I want him to think only of me when he's in his bed and I'm not
there. I wanted him to have a memory that he can take with him into his dreams. I want him to think 'Desiree who?' I want him to never again
feel the need to go elsewhere for sex. I am his sex. Me, just me, nobody else. I will never let him touch or go near another fucking
bitch ever again.
I fuck him and he thinks only of me. His eyes should only be on me. His mind will never wander again.
I left him in his bed a very satisfied man. I was anything but an angel, unless angels can fuck like that. I totally blew him away. I love
the way he moans when I fuck him hard. I love the way he tenses up when I move him. I love the way he calls my name when he comes. I love
the way his skin feels against mine. I love his hot ass. I love how he's got smooth skin all over, and I mean all over. I love most
of all the way he looks at me. That look he gives me is enough to make me hard in ten seconds flat.
I feel so great right now. I've never felt this amazing before and I owe it all to
Lex. He makes me feel like I can be myself and like
nothing will hurt us. He's perfect. We're perfect together.
~
06:23 am
I feel like a new man.
I need new clothes and some new things. I should burn these flannel shirts. They are so fucking ugly. I need a car. Lex will give me his
car. I probably don't even have to fuck him for it. I hate not having everything everybody else has. I have to pretend I'm satisfied with
the shit my parents give me. It's like Dad has something against having money. He's such an idiot. Good thing he's not my real father
otherwise I'd be just as lame.
I always hide my feelings from everybody. I'm going to tell Lex about my origins. Just as soon as I think he's ready for it. Right now I
think the fact that he's being fucked by an alien won't go over too well.
Dad is fucking pissing me off big time. He's such a control freak. He thinks I'll do everything his way. I made sure he didn't see the ring.
He'd just fucking bug me about it and I do not need that right now. If he knew how different from him I really am, he'd have a heart
attack. I can just imagine the look on his face when I tell him I suck cock and fuck Lex Luthor.
~
04:56 pm
I'm itching to get out tonight.
I feel like I've lived a life of boredom. Now it's time to have some fun. Nobody else wants to go with me to the bar tonight. At least I
made the new girl feel welcome. She's got a nice mouth but not as nice as Lex. She's very willing to do what I ask. She's also willing to go
out and have some fun. I never realized how stuck-up and boring Lana is until today. She totally acted weird when I flirted with Jessie. I
told Lana to loosen up a little. It's not like Jessie and I are dating. We're just having some fun. It's not like Lana and I are dating. I
wonder if she's jealous. Maybe Lana would like to have some fun with me. I wonder if she and Chloe would be into a nice little romp, just
the three of us. Better not to ask. They might get a little offended.
Jessie on the other hand has very nimble fingers and an amazing tongue. That was such a fucking amazing blow job. The fact that she
swallowed made it less messy. She even gave me her number.
I need a good fuck. I'm going over to see Lex and where ever I find him I am going to fuck him and show him who the boss is. I ran into
Metropolis to pick up a nice pair of black leather pants. He'll fucking believe that I can wear leather pants.
I think I look awesome in them. They are so fucking hot. I look so hot. I could have anybody I want.
Just like I thought; Dad flipped when he saw the ring. What a jerk. I can not believe he's still harping on that. What a loser. I did all my
chores like a good boy.
Now it's time to get me some Lex toy ass. I have to show Lex that he belongs to me, not the other way around. He won't fight me this time.
Yesterday he actually thought he could take over. Eventually he gave in. I don't really care. He's mine. There is no way he will ever match
my strength. If he tries to fight me again, I'll just tie him to the bed. That would be hot. I bet he'd love that. I know Lex did some
naughty stuff when he was younger. Now it's my turn.
~
11:28 am
Hot time last night.
I blew off study group to go into town and do some shopping. Actually I blew off study to group to go see
Lex. We
really needed the time together. He's so damn hot. We had the most amazing time last night. Those leather pants made his head spin. I
totally showed Lex how great I could look in leather. We had a great time poolside. He was already drinking when I got there. I hate that
he's letting his dad get to him so much. He should just kick the old geezer out and tell Mr. Blind to get lost.
At least nobody bothered Lex and me while we had sex. I went for a skinny dip before we had some fun. It felt so nice to glide through the
water naked. I never realized how much I love the feel of the air on my skin. I know I loved the attention
Lex paid me. He couldn't take his
eyes off my body. I felt free.
This time around I let him have a little bit of control, since he seems to perform so much better that way. He was stellar. He sucked me off
almost as soon as I got there. I love leather pants. They certainly got the desired effect. It amazes me how much stamina he has. I wasn't
sure he could keep up with me, but he was so hot. I get hard just thinking about how awesome he looked under me. He really knows how to make
me want him more. He had that look in his eyes and his hard body begged me to touch and fuck harder. When he told me he should fuck me I had
to draw the line. As if I'd let him go there now. I am so fucking hard just thinking about him. I'll probably have to go see him again
tonight.
I took the motorcycle into school this morning and I have to say, Jon did an awesome job on it. That thing rides like a dream. It didn't
hurt to have a babe behind me with her sweet arms around my waist. Jessie is quite the girl.
Lex was right; I do look good in green. I noticed that Lana has been giving me the eye today. I think that girl might be ready for some action
with yours truly.
PS - Jonathan is such an ass. He really thinks he can tell me what to do. He's not even my real father.
~
07:55 pm
I was wrong.
I did have to fuck Lex for the car. That's fine. It was an awesome fuck. I think I saw stars. He was so amazing. His old man took over his
home office so I gave Lex one of his sexual fantasies. We fucked on the desk. I made sure to leave a big mess.
Lex was lucky he walked away
from it.
Now I have to get ready for my night out with Lana. She's not a bad kisser. I cornered her at the Talon this afternoon and we talked. I
convinced her to go out with me tonight. The Ferrari is the perfect car for the
date. She deserves nice things.
Besides I could never imagine her on the back of the motorcycle. My Mom just tried to talk to me. I don't get her at all. She's gorgeous, an
amazing woman and totally wasted on that hick husband. I wish she'd go her own way.
I told her not to wait up for me. I plan on staying over with Lex. He's just itching for me to do more nasty things to him. Besides, I
really need to find out just how dirty he can get.
~
07:34 am
Last night was the best night of my life.
I spent the night with Lex. He was so amazing. I totally love him, but I have one problem. I hate this town and I am
out of here. I'm through being a farmer. I never wanted to be a farmer so I've decided to leave home, and get a new start.
I still have the car. That went off really well. I took Lana out to a bar. She wasn't really into it. She is so boring. She wanted to go
somewhere to talk. I'm sure she wanted me all to herself, but there was no way I was letting that happen. I have only one person in my life
and his name is Lex. Lana and I did run into Jessie at the bar. She looked so hot. Since
Lana took off on me before the bar fight, I left with a
more willing partner. At first we were going to take off together. As in leave town, but I wasn't really into that. We just had a little fun
in the car, and then I dropped her off at her place when I was finished with her. She was much more cooperative than
Lana. I was a little
disappointed since I would have really liked to see just how sweet Lana is. Jessie was kind of boring. Maybe I did it wrong.
After I dropped Jessie off I went over to return the car. I ran into Mr. K. I let him know that his boyfriend is an unwanted factor. He
really needs to get somebody who can appreciate those fine lips and that nice, tight body.
Lex was already in his room. We had the most amazing moment ever. He's perfect. I mean perfect. He's the most amazing thing that ever
happened to me. I left him in his bed completely satisfied. He had this glow in his eyes that I am very sure nobody else has ever put there.
I did have to tie him to the bed but that was so much fun and he loved it. Bed sheets are good for more than just making the bed. Right
after all the sex I had to tell him that he was way better than that girl. She really sucked in comparison. Just like I thought, he wasn't
bothered in the least by it. I did use protection when I was with her so there was nothing to worry about in that department.
Lex demanded
that I never sleep with anybody but him ever again. He looks so cute when he's demanding. That was an easy demand to comply with. He's going
to have a lot of late nights after this. It's so fun how even tied to the bed he can give off the best don't "fuck with me" vibe ever.
At first he was really mad. I had nothing to hide so I really didn't care, otherwise I would have made them locked, but
I changed his mind really fast. He was spreading his legs for me before he knew what hit him. He was hot. I was hot. We totally belong
together.
I'm going back as soon as I pack my bags. He's tied to the bed waiting for me.
~
09:25 am
This is so awesome.
Lex and I are leaving for Metropolis together, today. I am so excited.
I think I hear his old man shuffling through the hallways. He's like a little pet, only blind.
~
09:30 am
Oh!
Oh wait there he is. Man he's old! I can't believe he's Lex's Dad. They look nothing alike. Maybe
Lex is adopted.
~
09:45 am
Yummy
Dude! Wash that hair sometimes. Man.
So I arrived to find that Lex was free from his bed bondage. That's cool. I figured he'd get loose some time between when I left and now.
He's off to tie up loose ends while I wait. I blew him just before he left. He is so tasty. I love his cock. Especially when it's in my
mouth.
~
10:00 am
Hips
Just in case I never mentioned it, Lex has the most awesome body. He does this thing with his hips that makes me want
to throw him down and fuck him. It never fails to get me hard.
His old man however is ticking me off. I'm going to tell him where to go. Lex can't but I have no problem doing it. I wish
Lex would just
ship him off to a desert island.
~
06:57 pm
How am I ever going to face Lex again?
I went to check on Jessie but she was gone. I can't believe what I did to her. I almost got her and her dad killed. I slept with her! I
can't believe Lex didn't get mad. The only thing I can do now is hide and wait a few days for things to get back to normal.
I guess I can't really do that this time. It's not my fault. How was I supposed to know that the school would make the class ring out of red
meteor rocks and how was I supposed to know that it would affect me like a drug? I wish I'd never bought that ring. I wish I hadn't said all
those horrible things to Dad. I told Mom she should leave Dad!
I hurt Lex so many times. Although I don't really regret the sex we had. It was really nice. Except that last time when I tied him to his
bed, and showed him how strong I really am. Mom and Dad would kill me if they knew. I am never going to tell them any of the things I did.
Lana and Chloe are going to kill me.
I should sneak away in the middle of the night. There is no way I am going to be able to look Lex in the eyes after all the stuff I did to
him. What am I supposed to tell him? Mom and Dad said to just go with the truth, I was on drugs. It sounds like a lie to me even though it
is almost the truth. Maybe I should just go over to the mansion and face the music. Lex will understand. I could beg.
I'm going to call him to let him know I'm okay.
~
11:28 am
Things have been a little strange over the past week.
I sort of wasn't myself and I wanted to apologize to everybody for my rude behavior. I can't really explain what
happened. Things are back to normal, sort of. I still have to apologize to Lana and
Chloe. I talked to Lex last night. He came over after I left
a message on his phone. We talked it out and he didn't dump me. I'm really grateful for that.
Mom and Dad stood by me the whole time all this weirdness went down. I'm spending time with them today. Dad really needs my help since I
kind of went all rebel yell about farm work on him.
I just hope my friends can forgive me.
~
02:58 pm
All those things I did.
I have never been the kind of person to demand. Most of the time, I'm happy with my life the way it is. I love my parents. They took me in
and gave me unconditional love. They give me joy every single day. The things I said under the influence of that red meteor rock sting a lot
more than I could have dreamed. Dad isn't over it yet. I know he isn't. I can see it in his eyes. I don't blame him one bit. He has a right
to be angry and upset. I told him something that I know isn't true. He is my father in every way that counts.
I remember everything I did under the influence of the ring. I remember thinking that everything is mine. I owed nothing to anybody. I would
do things my way or you'd get pushed out of the way. I wanted and nothing would stop me. I took and didn't care who I hurt.
That is not me. I have never felt that way before. When I was in that bar, I wanted those people to be afraid of me. I wanted them to fear
my power. I showed them that they should fear my power, and they did. I remember for one moment, thinking that what I was doing was wrong. I
remember that I hated how they looked at me. I was a freak and they knew it. Then I didn't care. They didn't matter to me anyway was what I
thought.
All the things I did to Lex. Mom and Dad are right. The desires I hide and the feelings I bury were brought forward with the red rock. I
want Lex and I took him. I made him mine. He did what I wanted.
It hurts that I cheated on him. It hurts that I did that to Lex. He was so angry and practically ordered me to never do that again. I know I
won't. I really wish I hadn't done it. I really can't even remember why I did it except that she was there and I figured why not. I felt
defiant. Lex cheated now it's my turn. That is so totally not me. I do feel resentment over what happened with Desiree, but I know that
wasn't Lex's fault. I can't even believe that I kissed Lana and flirted with every girl that walked past me. I'm trying so hard to work all
this out in my head, but it's a lot harder to pin down than I thought it would be. I thought I could just say it happened and move on.
Except, I can't. If everything I did was my subconscious stretching its legs then why would I cheat? I have never once thought that I would
cheat on Lex. I have never once even wanted to cheat on Lex.
I remember thinking that she was there so I might as well take it since I could.
I have never wanted to hurt Dad and I did that, too. So maybe it wasn't just subconscious desires coming out. Maybe it was a separate
personality altogether. I don't know anymore. I hope this is the only time this happens. At least now that I know about the red rocks I can
avoid them. I hate the meteor rocks so much. They have done nothing but ruin my life and destroy people. Stupid rocks.
The sex was so amazing. I would never have been able to do those things if I was in my right mind. I don't know if I'll be able to look at
the desk in his office without turning bright red. Or the pool or his bed or that red Ferrari. Sex in a car totally sucks.
Well, now I know what sex with a girl is like. I wasn't that impressed. She didn't even come close to making me feel the way Lex makes me
feel. It's not even just a physical thing. I mean on an emotional level Lex takes my breath away. Even when I had the ring on I was in awe
of him. The night that I tied him to the bed, there was this moment where I felt more powerful than I had ever felt in my life. He was mine
and I was his.
~
10:19 pm
I feel so out of touch.
The weekend has been calm. It was much better than last week. I feel a little better now. I managed to track
Lana down on
Saturday. I found her riding. I think I got off lucky when she forgave me for my obnoxious behavior. She invited me to ride with her so we
did that for an hour. We didn't talk much, and I was glad for that. We just enjoyed each other's company. Then I went by the mansion to see
Lex. He was sort of just hanging out. We ended up watching some TV and just sitting quietly. It was really nice except for that fact that I
could see my previous treatment of him all over his body. I didn't know what to say. I still don't. I want to make it better. I wish I could
change it all so that it never happened. I know I can't do that, nobody can.
It was a wonderful night. I think I felt more intimate with him that night than in all our encounters the last week. Although the last
encounter where I tied him up was different. I felt like we came to this understanding between us. I told him that I totally love him. I
really do. I adore him and he's become somebody I look up to. I feel so lucky to have him and to have him forgive me so easily.
Dad forgave me, too. Mom and Dad have both been so amazing. I can't really talk to them about all this. It's too much right now. Maybe after
a while, after I've gained some distance from what I did, I can talk to Mom.
~
02:25 pm
I went over to see Lex.
Last night I couldn't sleep so I ran over to the mansion and sneaked past the security. It's probably a bad thing to do, but I didn't want
anybody to know that I was there. I was hoping I could just be in Lex's room with him and not wake him up, but he woke up. I probably should
have stayed home. I needed to know that he was fine. That all those things I did had no lasting impact.
I keep thinking I can do these stupid things and everything will be fine, but they won't. I know they won't. Life was so much easier before
the red meteor rock, and before I found out about my heritage. Now I feel as though everything in my life is tainted by what I am and those
rocks.
I only wanted to be with Lex, and when he asked me if everything was okay I couldn't lie. I did lie at first but then I told him it wasn't
but that I wasn't ready to talk about it. I probably never will be able to talk to him about what really happened. How do I say it? I
thought about it last night. That was why I couldn't sleep. I can't get that last time out of my head. I wanted Lex to know. I must have
since I didn't hide my strength at all. He knows now that there is something about me. Maybe he thinks I was mutated by the meteors like
some of the other people around here. If only that were true, then this would all be so much easier.
I know what happened wasn't my fault. I keep telling myself that it's a good thing we found out about the red meteor rocks. I keep telling
my self that everybody is fine. Nobody really got hurt that badly, but that isn't true. So many things happened that I would never have
done. I never would have kissed Lana. I never would have demanded sex from Jessie. I didn't tell Lex the details of what happened, but it
wasn't nice. She was into it, but I suggested that we do it. It's not like she could fight me off. Then it was literally a quick fuck in the
car and I dropped her off at home. I hardly gave her much time to say anything. I was a total dog. Right after I fucked her all I could
think was that Lex was at the mansion and he'd be a much better fuck. And that he'd probably let me do anything to him.
At least I used a condom with Jessie.
The first time Jessie and I had sex in the girl's bathroom at school, I pushed her to her knees and told her that she could suck me off and
that if she serviced me I'd like her more.
Last night was not about sex at all. It was about the intimate closeness that I have with Lex. I can't seem to get that from anybody else in
my life. When I asked him if I could stay he didn't hesitate to let me crawl under the covers with him. I stripped down to my boxers (now
that I think about it, I could have just taken all my clothes off, since he's pretty much seen me naked a million time.) and crawled under
the covers with him. He was so warm and inviting. I cringed to see that his wrists are still bruised from when I tied him up.
Lex woke up in the middle of the night from a nightmare. It was probably about me. I guess I shouldn't assume that since his father is still
staying at the mansion with him.
When I went home this morning Mom and Dad were already at the breakfast table, eating. I didn't lie to them. I told them I was out and that
I'd kind of fallen asleep at the mansion, which was the truth. Dad freaked, and Mom covered for me, saying she'd given me permission last
night to go over. She did remind me to call if I was going to be staying over. I had planned to wake up real early, but I actually didn't
care that Dad and Mom knew where I was. Lex is important to me. Mom knows why and though Dad doesn't I will not hide how much he means to me
from Dad, except the sex stuff. That I will hide, for now.
So far school has been fine. Chloe doesn't seem out for my balls, yet. Maybe Lana didn't tell her about the kiss. She must have. When I
first saw her this morning I rushed away as she called to me. I even avoided the Torch since she spends so much time there. Pete didn't say
I was in the dog house with her, but that doesn't mean I'm not. Just in case I better be extra nice to Chloe and Lana. Maybe if I do
everything for them today, they'll forget what I did.
Feegan stopped by yesterday afternoon to talk. He just wanted me to know that things between us were cool. I can't even believe that he's
still talking to me after those things I said. I pushed myself on him. I am so glad I didn't do anything more. If he hadn't stopped me I
might have done worse. It was in my head. I remember that much. I remember thinking he needed a good man to show him a real fuck. I don't
think Lex would have forgiven me so easily if I'd done more to Feegan.
I guess I'll just have to keep going and hope for the best. Everybody is still talking to me so I guess it's not all bad.
~
11:23 pm
Poetry sucks unless you have the right person with you.
My day started off kind of boring. Class sucked. I was totally not into it. English Class sucked. For one thing it
ended my "avoidance-of-Chloe" dance. I was doing so well, but I shouldn't have worried. She wasn't even mad at me. We hugged and made up which
is great because I really missed her. We have an English assignment due on Friday which would have been hard to finish if I was still
avoiding her.
After school I went to the Talon to do my homework. Why do I have to know the difference between Byron and Yeats or whatever his name is?
Luckily Lex rescued me from the boredom. He showed up just in time. I was just about to throw the book across the room. I was so glad to see
him since it spared anybody from being clocked in the head by bad poetry.
Just as we were leaving, Mr. K showed up with his new assistant. I don't remember her name since I was kind of busy staring at
Lex. He acts
so different in public. It's interesting to watch and so subtle. She seemed nice though I didn't
really talk to her. I guess Lex is giving Mr. K more things to do in his company if Mr. K needs an assistant.
We went back to the mansion and sat on the floor in his office in front of a fire. He made me read Byron out loud. I guess it was okay, but
I still don't get it. That really didn't matter because I actually liked reading it to him. We had this amazing moment, so intimate. It was
so nice to just kiss him and be with him.
Have you ever told somebody that you love them and really meant it? I mean feel it deep down to the core that they are who you want for the
rest of your life? I felt that tonight. I looked into his eyes and knew I was where I belonged.
I had to leave for dinner after we spent some time talking about emotions and multilayered interpretational something-or-other, but I feel
like we're really back on track. I feel confident that things between us are going to be just fine. I should read poetry to him more often.
I think it did something to me.
~
12:11 pm
Produce delivery day was never so amazing.
Yesterday delivery day was so nice! When I got to the mansion, Lex said he had something upstairs for me. He played my own trick on me and I
totally fell for it. I thought he was going to give me something. He did give me something. He gave me some awesome sex. When we got up to
his room, and I turned around to find him locking the bedroom door, I was hard in seconds. The playful look on his face said it all.
He practically threw me on his bed. It was totally hot. I couldn't get enough of his skin and his lips and his body. He's so amazing in bed.
There was lots of foreplay and I have to say, I love foreplay. It's so much fun and being hard the whole time makes the sex after that much
sweeter. I stripped him naked and sucked him off. His body is so warm and inviting. I can't not touch when he's under me.
Then we fucked. I topped. I think I really love to top. It's what feels so right for us. It all felt so right for us. He's so pliant under
my touch. I have to hold back from chanting 'mine' every time I have him.
Right now things between us are just all around great. I think I'm going to go over again today. I want more sex. I am so horny right now,
and I had to jerk off twice last night even after all the sex we had. My sex meter must be turned on superhigh.
I have his picture with me at school today. Every once in a while I take it out just so I can stare at it. This is one secret that I love to
keep.
Back to Byron or Moron as Pete and I like to call him.
~
02:58 pm
WHEN WE TWO PARTED
by: Lord Byron
WHEN we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.
The dew of the morning
Sunk chill on my brow--
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame:
I hear thy name spoken,
And share in its shame.
They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shudder comes o'er me--
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee too well:
Long, long shall I rue thee,
Too deeply to tell.
In secret we met--
I silence I grieve,
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive.
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee?
With silence and tears.
This is a really sad poem. I think.
Chloe' cousin's Mom died the other day. I spent almost all morning with Chloe working on our English assignment. It went fine. We got an A.
Chloe was
very upset so I stayed with her for a while.
Tomorrow is Lana's birthday. I talked to Lex about throwing her a surprise party and everything is set. I spent my lunch in the Torch office
and I'm spending the rest of my free period here. I promised Chloe I'd finish off anything that still needed doing. The printer is down again.
~
11:15 pm
A night by the fire and birthday party.
I went by the mansion late last night after dinner and chores. Lex and I had a great time. We just sat on the floor by the fire and played
chess. I lost every game. Lex is really good. He was always two or three moves ahead of me. I just loved being close to him even if he won
every game. His eyes sparkled. In the firelight they turned a deep blue that hypnotized me. He must have thought I was a completely dork,
the way I stared at him.
The mansion was so quiet and so was Lex; he was really calm. We even rolled around on the floor making out. I had so much fun. I never
thought I would see him so relaxed. His guard was down and his gaze was so pure. He melted my heart. If I wasn't already in love I would
have totally fallen for him. It was the perfect night.
On my way out of the mansion I ran into Lex's dad, Mr. Big. I swear he was waiting to ambush me. He acted all weird, saying stuff about how
he hoped my parents weren't mad that I was spending so much time with Lex. That man totally creeps me out. He may be blind, but I swear he
was staring right at me. He kept making these odd statements about my parents. Like that has anything to do with him at all.
I try hard to be careful whenever I go over there. I don't want anybody to get the wrong idea. Whenever we're in public I try not to look
too obvious. I don't want people to clue in because Lex would get into a lot of trouble. I can't make a mistake because he's too important
to me. Even in the mansion I always make sure there's nobody around. I'll have to be more careful around his Dad. Maybe I should lock him in
his room.
We had a party for Lana today. She was totally surprised. It was nice to see the look on her face when she saw the trouble we'd gone to for
her. I ended up getting her a book of poetry. Something called Classic Love Poems. I wasn't sure if she'd like it, but she seemed to so I
guess I did okay. I had a great time. Lex was there though sometimes when I looked over at him he seemed distant. Maybe he felt left out. I
didn't get a chance to ask. By the time the party was over it was late and I went straight home after.
~
10:29 pm
Stars are also fire
I didn't do much of anything today except boring farm work. Harvest time is always so busy for me. The fact that I can carry the same weight
as a truck doesn't hurt. Dad and I managed to get a lot done. Mostly I was the one who got a lot done. I know I totally freak Dad out when I
use my abilities blatantly in front of him. Today I was lifting the tractor yet again to change the back tire. Tractors are a bitch to
change the tire on. I was totally distracted wondering about how much the tractor weighed, and the look on Lex's face if he ever saw me do
this when Dad came running up. He was shouting that a car was coming up the driveway. I look over to see Pete driving up. It was totally
hilarious when I told Dad I would put the tractor down as soon as I was done screwing in the bolts.
When he spun around to see that it was only Pete the look of relief on his face was priceless. It would have been cool if it had been Lex
although maybe he might have had a heart attack. Knowing Lex he'd probably tuck his hands in his pants pocket and greet Dad as if nothing
unusual was happening.
Pete and I went up to my loft after and hung out. I kind of wish I'd been allowed to keep the game system I bought when I was on the red
meteor rock. Instead we mostly talked. He had brought his new girlfriend to Lana's birthday party. Pete tried to convince me that I should
have taken that opportunity to go after Lana, but I gave him a stern warning and a glare, reminding him that I have heat vision. I joked
that I wasn't always in complete control of it and that sometimes when I got really ticked off, falls of flame have been known to erupt
unexpectedly. It totally cracked him up.
I told him I wasn't interested in hooking up with anybody. He finally got the hint and we spent the next few hours talking about his new
flame. He is such a dog and she is in so much trouble.
He left just before dinner. When I went inside to wash up, I got the impression I had interrupted something between my parents. I hope they
aren't fighting. When I asked what was going on they both said nothing.
Now that I've had dinner and done the evening chores I thought I would finally get around to doing my homework. That took about five
minutes. I love my speed ability. I played some basketball alone until the sunlight had completely faded and now I'm sitting here staring at
the stars and thinking about life on other planets.
I wonder what my home world is called. It's probably something like Dork World. That would be funny.
~
11:24 am
Poetry is evil
I am convinced that poetry was invented to annoy me. Lana had some mushy poem left on her parent's grave and she thinks it's romantic. I think
it's totally creepy. Some person is stalking her and all she can do is be all aflutter over a few sentences. I know I shouldn't have mocked
it. I know I was wrong. I went to tell her I was sorry after class but, she got kind of mad at me. I just don't want her to get hurt and she
just seems too wrapped up in that piece of paper.
Chloe just asked me to keep an eye on Lana just in case. At least I'm not the only one who thinks the secret admirer could be dangerous, though I
admit to thinking that part of her concern is because she's probably jealous. I would be if somebody sent some mushy poem to my boyfriend.
Actually, I am kind of jealous, but mostly because both Lana and Lex seem to understand poetry so much better than I do.
Lex and I went for a
drive after we ran into each other at the Talon. We pulled over at a secluded spot and made out in his car. I wanted him to stay with me
forever, but he had to get back to work. We talked a little about my inability to understand poetical verse. I'm going to give it another
try. Lex said that maybe I just haven't found the right poem.
Maybe this sounds dumb but I'm a little afraid that my lack of connection to poetry would spell my doom. I saw the way
Lana was looking at him
when they were talking about it. She looked really enthralled and I know she gets it.
I just find the whole thing totally frustrating. The worse part is even after all of
Lex's reassurance I still feel like on this level I'll
never be able to relate to him. I can't even find the right words to say what it is I want to say. I always fall back on kissing and
touching. Maybe I could memorize some romantic stuff and say it to him next time we're together. That is if I can even figure out what poem
is romantic. Knowing me I'd end up picking something that means I hate him.
I'll have to do some research. Or maybe somebody could point me in the right direction.
~
12:27 pm
I feel like such a bully.
Last night I followed Lana to her parent's grave. Chloe was worried that something might happen to her so she asked me to
keep an eye out for her. We found the guy that left the poem for her. His name is Byron (figures). I freaked and pushed him away from
Lana
only I kind of pushed him too hard and he fell and hit his head on one of the gravestones.
He passed out so I had to carry him to my parent's truck, (which I had borrowed to follow
Lana). We took him back to the Talon and fed him and
Lana made him some coffee. I think she really likes him. At least she seems to. He recited some Shakespeare to her and she went all glowy.
I felt terrible for hurting him, but I wasn't quite sure what to say. I can tell there's no way he'd ever hurt anybody. He's so soft. I
don't know how else to describe him without saying he's kind of girly.
There's more to this story. It gets really weird from here. We think he's being abused by his parents. They've sheltered him all his life
and he said he doesn't get out much. His wrists are scarred by marks that look like he was tied up or something. I felt so bad for him. I
thought my parents were strict but Byron's parents sound beyond anything I've ever heard.
Byron freaked out when he realized it was almost daylight. Lana and I drove him back to his house and he raced inside. His father threatened
Lana and me with a shotgun. It was so freaky. Byron looked so terrified I wanted to rush in and grab him and take him away from there.
We drove back to my place as fast as we could and told my parents what happened. When we went back to Byron's with the sheriff, Byron's
parents claimed they had never seen Lana and me before and that Byron had died years ago!
This is so totally bizarre. We did not imagine Byron. He was real. I touched him and I sure as heck remember how much he weighed.
We're going to look into it more with Chloe. I'm sure she can find something that will help us solve this mystery. I feel so bad for Byron. He
seems like such a nice smart guy. It's a shame that he's been sheltered like that.
I might just try out some Shakespeare and see what it's like. It sounded really nice when Byron quoted it.
~
03:12 pm
Such a long way to go
Byron has a beast inside him. He comes out in the sunlight. When I saw him chained to that wall, I wanted to trash that
house. Instead I broke his shackles and made things worse. When he got out in the sun he transformed into a monster. It took me almost the
rest of the day to find him again. He attacked my Mom and Mr. Big, but I saved them.
Once I got Byron back in the darkness he reverted back to normal. I wish there was more I could do for him. He looked so afraid when he
turned back to normal. He kept apologizing for hurting people, and he had such sadness in his eyes. I stayed with him while we waited for
somebody to get us out of the well. They threw a blanket over him so the sunlight wouldn't touch his skin. I stayed with him all the way to
the hospital, trying to keep him distracted. I had to keep fighting the urge to hold his hand. He was just so afraid. I can understand why.
He was so strong and he hurt Pete and Lana and I feel like if I had been more careful none of it would have happened, but then maybe he wouldn't
be getting the help he needs. I just saw him at the hospital. He looks much better and I brought him a book of limericks to keep him
occupied. I left him with Lana. They seem to get along really well. I think I'm kind of jealous though I'm not really sure why. I know I don't
like Lana that way anymore.
So it turns out Byron had some experimental drug used on him and the side effect was that he can't go out in the daytime, which explains his
paleness. He's going to get some help. It seems like things are back to normal.
~
10:52 am
Last night was so amazing.
I went by the mansion to see Lex after dinner last night. I finally found a poem (sort of) that says what I wanted to say to him. It's not
really a poem, but it was perfect for what I needed. I played it for him and we had this awesome moment where we just held each other. The
lights were low and the fireplace was going. I think I totally blew Lex away.
I think I fell in love all over again. He's the most amazing person I have ever met. He's all these things I dreamed about and more.
When I got home I had to jerk off. I was so horny, but I didn't want what we shared to be just about sex. I wanted it to be about feelings.
I wanted it to be something spiritual, and it was. But man, it took ten seconds for me to come once I was in my room alone.
~
09:39 pm
A new friend
I just got back from visiting Byron. Since the sun had already set we were able to go outside. He's so optimistic about
the doctors finding a cure. It was nice to see him so positive. This time I gave him that Shakespeare book I'd tried out. He read some of it
to me and tried to explain the passages. I get that it's what you see in the words but I got the impression that it's way more than that for
him. He gets this look in his eyes when he says the words, it's like he's looking into some far-away place, it's a place that only he can
see.
Anyway, it was nice to hang out and see him so upbeat. He thanked me about a million times for helping him, which was nice but kind of made
me feel a little uncomfortable.
At least I don't have any homework to do. I did it all during free period. I have to get up early to do the market with Dad. I think he and
Mom are sort of fighting. Her new job is not exactly a dream for my Dad.
Oh well, I should call Lex and see if he wants to hang tomorrow night.
~
12:26 pm
I was so busy this weekend that I hardly had a chance to breathe.
Harvest time is here and I am working like a dog to get everything done. We spent all weekend working, except parts of
Sunday when I went over to hang with Pete. His brother let us borrow the dirt bikes again. It was so much fun. I totally love being on a dirt
bike. Harvest stuff is kind of boring so I'll spare you the details, but dirt biking was awesome.
I did do the farmer's market with Dad only since Mom was busy with her new job. Dad wasn't pleased to say the least. It was all he talked
about Saturday morning and afternoon. Actually it was all he talked about, period. He really hates Mr. Big. At one point I started to tune
Dad out then finally I told him what I told Lex; Mom can take care of herself. She knows what she's getting into. This is not to say that I
am not worried, I am worried but my Mom looks so happy and this morning she was so excited. I meant to talk to her about Byron, but I
totally forgot, and when I did remember she was busy. I can catch her another time.
I have so much work to do this week. The tractor is broken again. I hate that thing.
I called Lex Saturday. I loved just calling him about nothing. We also talked about what we're going to dress up as for Saturday's Talon
Halloween party. This year I am not going as a lion. I've decided to be Dracula. A classic and the costume should be easy. At first
Lex said
he wasn't dressing up then after a lot of begging on my part he decided he will dress up. He's going to go as a Mafia hit. I thought for
sure he meant hit man since that would be a very cool and super easy costume to do, but he meant hit, as in killed by the mob. A very morbid
choice, but I guess since I'll be a blood-loving creature of the night I'll have an excuse to follow him around all night.
The cool thing is Mom is going to pay me to help her out with deliveries and her catering business. She needs extra help with things, and
she offered me a great wage for my time.
~
11:09 am
I'm worried about Lex
Last night I went along with my Mom to this business seminar thing held at our school gym. Mom catered and I helped
out. Lex was supposed to speak along with Lana about local business, only he stopped half way through his speech. It seemed like the whole
town was there. My friend Pete wasn't since he overdid it on the weekend. His parents got a little mad at him. On the weekend he told me his
arm was fine, but apparently it wasn't as fine as he thought. Pete is not at school today. I'll have to go visit him as soon as I can.
First I have to go make sure Lex is okay. Mom said it was okay if I went there first instead of straight home for chores. When I talked to
him last night he said he was fine, just tired and over worked. I think I'll go over and help him relax for a bit. He works so hard and
takes on so much. I can't even imagine doing all the things he does. He's probably just overworked and I'm worrying over nothing. Still it's
better to be safe.
Lana took over for him. She seemed nervous, but I think she did a great job. She looked amazing. Mom paid me last night so I have enough money
to start gathering my costume together. I can reuse some of the clothes I bought a few weeks ago. This is going to be fun.
~
05:17 pm
I just came back from Lex's place.
He was acting so weird. He was drinking and he kept telling me to prove that I love him. Then he said the only way I ever prove it is
physically. I didn't know what to say. I tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't' listen to me. I tried to tell him I have told him the truth.
I tried to let him know that I give everything I can give.
He flinched when I touched him and his body was so stiff. I can see that I make him sick. I can tell by the look in his eyes. It's the same
look Dad had in his eyes sometimes.
Lex may have been drunk but he was right. I always turn everything between us into sex, and then when he wants to talk I stop him. Is that
love? Wouldn't real love mean opening my heart to him completely? If I can't do that then
Lex is right, I shouldn't come back until I am
ready to tell him the truth. I will probably never see him again. He's right to get rid of me. He's right to not believe me. I am nothing
but a liar.
I can't do this any more. I can't keep it up like this. It's too much. It's not fair. I hate my life so much. All I do is hurt everybody I
touch. All I ever do is destroy everything around me. My hands will never hurt anybody ever again.
Good bye.
~
05:34 pm
Dear Mom and Dad
I really appreciate everything you've done for me. Please don't blame yourselves for what I am about to do. It's better for everybody if I'm
not here any more. It'll make your lives so much easier. You and Dad can get a normal boy instead of one who destroys everything. The green
rocks came with me and it's only fitting that they take me away.
Love
your son Clark
PS: please tell Lex that I'm sorry.
~
05:36 pm
Lex
I am so sorry, Lex.
You're right. Just know that I love you more than I could ever say or show.
I wish things could have been different between us.
Love,
Clark
~
01:21 pm
Much better today
Just to let you all know that I am fine now. I feel much better and after a good night's sleep I see things differently.
I know I can work things out with Lex. Last night after he told me to leave I felt so lost and alone. It was like this voice in my head kept
telling me I was never going to be accepted by him or anybody else. I felt like things would never change for us and that I was just wasting
time. Mom stayed with me all night. I don't even know what possessed me to feel so desperate and think that all was lost. All I can remember
is this complete feeling of total dread.
I feel better today. That note I left to Lex here doesn't have a comment so I hope he didn't read it.
I just wish I could figure out what happened. I was fine when I went over there.
Lex wasn't fine. He was drunk and saying crazy things. The
only person I had contact with when I went over there was Lex. Although, I did run into some guy I'd never seen before. I'm not willing to
discount anything at this point with how crazy our town can be. I have to get
Chloe on this.
I have no idea what to say to Mom and Dad. This morning I was fine, but last night I was saying crazy things to Mom. I can't believe I did
that to her, I can't believe I did that to my parents. I can't believe I did any of it, but those voices were so overpowering.
I have to go see Lex right now.
~
11:20 pm
I don't even know where to start.
All I can say is I am so glad I made it in time. Lex is finally asleep. I found him jumping off the bridge where we first met and I saved
him, again. He's alive and he's right here warm and breathing and the best thing that ever happened to me.
I am too afraid to leave him. I want to stay with him forever. I hate that this happened to him and again it's my fault. Those fucking
rocks! I hate them so much. They are nothing but a curse.
But he's alive and I'm alive and we're fine. We're going to all be fine. Maybe if I type it enough times I will truly believe it.
~
10:58 pm
I spent the whole day with Lex.
He's fine and I'm fine. It's been such a relaxing day. I feel so lazy. I pretty much did nothing but watch
Lex. He's so
gorgeous. I paid very close attention to him mostly because of what happened. I was sure it wouldn't happen again since things were back to
normal, mostly. It's too bizarre to repeat.
I fell asleep last night beside Lex on his bed. After I found him and brought him home, we stayed inside all night and all day today. I woke
up almost on top of him. I think even in my sleep I didn't want to let go of him. I woke up drooling all over his shoulder. That was totally
embarrassing. I think he was okay with it though, since he didn't kick me out of bed.
Lex mostly just relaxed. He did try to do some work in the afternoon. Then Broody called. After
Lex finished with the call, we made some
dinner and just relaxed.
Lana brought my homework to me. I didn't want to leave, but Lex reassured me he's much better now. We did have time for some major lip-lock
action. Sometimes I just wish my body would obey my mind. I really wanted more, but I knew he wasn't up for it. Besides, I have hands.
Now I just want to get some sleep. I am dead tired.
~
05:59 pm
I have had the nicest day, for a change.
It was almost a relief to get back to some semblance of normalcy after everything that happened. I went to school today
and I have to say, it was so nice. I spent most of lunch with Pete. I had to stop off at the Torch office for a second.
Chloe and her annoying
cousin were there. Annoying cousin actually apologized for her bad behavior from last summer. I'd totally forgotten about that. I guess
maybe that was why I found her so annoying. I usually get along with everybody but she is just so pushy and talks way too much.
Still, I accepted her apology and ran off to meet Pete. We had to rush into town just after school because he still had to get some finishing
touches for his costume. I found the most amazing tacky necklace for the Dracula costume. It's going to be perfect. I decided to use some
clothes I hardly ever wear. With the few extra pieces I got and the black cape, which is long enough for me, it'll be perfect. I even picked
up some cheesy fangs. At least this year I won't look like a dork.
I haven't talked to Lex today. I'm going over later to see him. Right now I have to have dinner. Mom made my favorite. When I got home from
school she was here. I was happy to see her since I really hadn't had much chance to be close to her since the thing happened. I wish I
could take it all back. I really hate that she had to find me like that. I know it isn't my fault, but that doesn't take away the fact that
Mom looks at me differently. I want to reassure her and I'm sure that she knows it won't happen again. I just wish I could take away her
pain.
~
07:34 pm
Tonight's the night
I am ready to go and I have the costume to prove it. I really wish I didn't have to go to this boring party. I would
rather just storm the castle. Lex is going to be there. I think as soon as he arrives I will grab him and drag him off for some alone time.
It's been too long and I am tired of all this emotional stuff. I want to get me some of that sweet
Lex love. I feel super horny tonight and
I am not going to take no for an answer. Besides, I bet he is just as anxious to get some as I am.
I'd say wish me luck but let's face it, I do not need luck. This costume is enough to melt anybody's thighs. Not to mention the fact that I
have such a hot bod.
~
03:05 am
Tonight was definitely the night.
Lex was so hot I thought I was going to combust or shoot fire out of my eyes. That would have been totally funny, especially if I had set
fire to something.
The party was kind of boring. Although there were some very cute girls there and Byron was there so it wasn't a total loss. I had a great
time talking to him. He claims that Beth was only there as a friend and not a date. I was hoping we'd get a chance to talk in private so I
could tell him that he was barking up the wrong tree with Lana, but Lex showed up all bloody. We danced around each other. I tried to get him
to relax but getting him to chill in public is like harder than the hardest thing you could ever imagine doing.
He spurned my advances, not that I let anybody there see me hit on him. After he spent a few minutes with Mr. K and that jerk
he is still
dating, he talked to Chloe and her annoying cousin. Would you believe that her initials are
Lana? I'll just say her name is Lois. I watched from
the sidelines as she tried to apologize to Lex about something she did last summer.
Lex didn't even remember her. It was a highlight of the
evening.
After that I got bored so I dragged Lex out of there. I took a major chance and kissed him right there on Main Street. It was dark and late
and there was nobody around. We drove to the mansion and I waited on the first floor while
Lex changed out of his bloody costume, though I
guess it wasn't actually blood.
While he was upstairs I moved a few things around. I really thought the arm chairs looked out of place where they were. I hope his Dad
doesn't mind too much.
When Lex came back down I was ready for some action. We went up to his private room and fucked three times, four if you count the blow job I
woke him up with after the first fuck. I have no idea what his problem was. All I wanted was to cut loose. I was sick of things being tense
and this past week has been so fucking tense. I hated it. I wanted a good hard fuck but
Lex stopped me half way through. At first he was a
killjoy. I almost left to get it somewhere else, but then he told me he'd make it up to me so I stayed. He rode me like a pro, which I guess
he is. What with all that experience he has. Good thing I'm the one that gets to benefit from it.
We had the best sex ever. He tired me out, but I woke to find his ass pressed against my face which was the coolest wake up ever. He's got
such a fine ass. And he is beyond tasty. Once he loosened up it was amazing.
I have to do this more often. I just love to see Lex pinned under me. He is so feisty. It's such a big turn on.
I just got home after our fourth time. I wish I could have stayed, but I can always go back for more. It's not like he's going anywhere.
~
09:48 pm
It happened again
The necklace I bought for my costume was made of meteor rock. I should have known, but I didn't pick up on it until after I took it off
early this morning.
I almost raped Lex. I stopped when he asked me to, but not because I wanted to. I remember feeling so angry that he wasn't letting me do
things my way. I wanted it rough and hard, and he told me I was acting strange.
When I bought the necklace I touched the stone in the store and I had to own it. I put it on last night and felt so wonderful. I felt happy
for the first time in a while. I felt like nothing mattered and that I would have fun no matter what.
I'm so glad I listened to Lex when he asked me to stop. He must be in so much pain. We had sex four times and I wasn't gentle.
Sometimes I feel like I should just give in and embrace that part of me. It makes me so tired and I haven't talked to Lex yet and I am too
afraid that this time he'll tell me to explain or to not bother coming back. I don't know what to say this time and if I lie he'll know. I
know he knows and I can tell that he knows. I'm so tired of the lies, more tired than Lex.
I'm too afraid to tell the truth. I just want to forget and pretend I'm human. I just want everybody else to think I'm human. I wish Mom and
Dad had never told me. I wish so many things were different.
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